German · C2 · Family moment
Stepping out of the family referee role in German
Set clear limits on mediating between adult relatives while keeping your care available. German topic frames with was … betrifft and was … angeht specify exactly what a boundary applies to, without making it a rejection of the whole relationship.
What you'll learn
- Use was … betrifft and was … angeht to frame a specific family issue.
- Put the topic object in the accusative and follow the frame with main-clause verb-second order.
- Distinguish explicit topic frames from case-matched left dislocation.
- Recognise when precise framing sounds helpful, formal or emotionally distancing.
German phrases for stepping out of the family referee role
Was euren Streit betrifft, werde ich keine Nachrichten überbringen.
As far as your disagreement goes, I won't carry messages.
Euren Streit is the accusative topic object. The boundary concerns carrying messages, not maintaining contact.
Was meine Beziehung zu ihr angeht, spreche ich für mich selbst.
When it comes to my relationship with her, I'll speak for myself.
The frame separates your own relationship from the relatives' dispute.
Was den Sonntag betrifft, seid ihr beide willkommen, aber ich werde keine Verhandlungen leiten.
As for Sunday, you're both welcome, but I'm not chairing negotiations.
Den Sonntag is accusative inside the frame. The welcome remains explicit despite the boundary.
Was das angeht, was er gemeint hat, musst du ihn direkt fragen.
Regarding what he meant, you'll need to ask him directly.
Das is the topic object, expanded by was er gemeint hat. The full frame is precise but somewhat weighty in conversation.
Was meinen eigenen Anteil betrifft, bin ich bereit zuzuhören.
Where my own part is concerned, I'm willing to listen.
Meinen eigenen Anteil limits the offer to your own involvement, rather than agreeing to judge the entire dispute.
Was das Parteiergreifen angeht, ist das keine Voraussetzung dafür, dass ich dich liebe.
As for choosing sides, that's not a condition of loving you.
The frame isolates taking sides as the issue; the following statement keeps love separate from allegiance.
Was die organisatorischen Absprachen betrifft, kann ich helfen, ohne eine der beiden Darstellungen zu bewerten.
On practical arrangements, I can help without judging either account.
The frame limits help to practical coordination rather than deciding whose version is right.
Was die Versöhnung angeht, müsst ihr selbst das Tempo bestimmen.
When it comes to reconciliation, the pace has to be yours.
Ihr addresses both relatives. The frame leaves the pace of reconciliation with them.
Hear these phrases and practise them
Tildi plays every phrase out loud, tests you in five-minute lessons and builds them into bedtime stories from your own picture books.
Try it free for 7 daysKey words
der Streit; plural: die Streite
disagreement; dispute
The plural is uncommon; Streitigkeiten is often used for multiple disputes.
die Nachricht; plural: die Nachrichten
message
Nachrichten überbringen means to carry or relay messages.
die Beziehung; plural: die Beziehungen
relationship
Meine Beziehung zu ihr means my relationship with her.
die Verhandlung; plural: die Verhandlungen
negotiation
Verhandlungen leiten means to chair or lead negotiations; deliberately formal in this family context.
der Anteil; plural: die Anteile
part; share; involvement
Mein eigener Anteil can refer to your own contribution to a difficult situation.
das Parteiergreifen; plural: none
taking sides
Names the act of supporting one side in a dispute.
die Voraussetzung; plural: die Voraussetzungen
condition; prerequisite
Keine Voraussetzung dafür means not a prerequisite for it.
die Absprache; plural: die Absprachen
arrangement; agreement
Organisatorische Absprachen covers practical coordination.
die Darstellung; plural: die Darstellungen
account; version of events
A neutral alternative to wording that labels either account true or false.
die Versöhnung; plural: die Versöhnungen
reconciliation
Usually singular when referring to the process of making peace.
Building an explicit topic frame
Use was + accusative topic object + betrifft or angeht, followed by a comma. Both expressions mean roughly 'as far as … is concerned'. The topic object belongs to the framing clause, not to the following main clause.
| Use | Form | Example |
|---|---|---|
| With betrifft | Was + accusative topic object + betrifft, … | Was euren Streit betrifft, werde ich keine Nachrichten überbringen. |
| With angeht | Was + accusative topic object + angeht, … | Was meinen eigenen Anteil angeht, bin ich bereit zuzuhören. |
| Visible accusative marking | der Sonntag → den Sonntag | Was den Sonntag betrifft, seid ihr beide willkommen. |
Main-clause order after the frame
In this pattern, the whole initial frame occupies the first position. The main clause's finite verb follows immediately after the comma, before the subject. Verb-second refers to positions, not individual words.
| Use | Form | Example |
|---|---|---|
| Finite verb before subject | [Was … betrifft], werde ich … | Was euren Streit betrifft, werde ich keine Nachrichten überbringen. |
| Not subject then verb | …, kann ich …; not …, ich kann … | Was die Absprachen angeht, kann ich helfen. |
Scope and interpersonal effect
The frame limits the statement to a named topic. This helps separate a refusal to mediate from a refusal of affection or contact. Betrifft often sounds more formal; angeht is often more conversational, though both can sound distancing. Repeating either frame in every turn can make family conversation feel like an agenda.
| Use | Form | Example |
|---|---|---|
| Limited refusal | Name the dispute, then state the boundary. | Was euren Streit betrifft, werde ich keine Nachrichten überbringen. |
| Limited availability | Name your involvement, then offer openness. | Was meinen eigenen Anteil angeht, bin ich bereit zuzuhören. |
Distinct from case-matched left dislocation
A was-frame is a clause whose topic object is accusative because of betrifft or angeht. It does not require a case-matched resumptive demonstrative in the main clause. In left dislocation, the detached topic and its resumptive demonstrative match in case instead.
| Use | Form | Example |
|---|---|---|
| Explicit frame | Accusative object inside the frame; no resumptive required | Was euren Streit betrifft, möchte ich mich heraushalten. |
| Contrast: left dislocation | Detached topic + case-matched resumptive | Euren Streit, den möchte ich nicht schlichten. |
More examples
Was euren Streit angeht, werde ich nicht vermitteln. Für euch beide bin ich trotzdem da.
As far as your dispute is concerned, I won't mediate. I'm still here for both of you.
The frame limits the refusal; the second sentence makes continued care explicit.
Was meinen eigenen Anteil betrifft, höre ich dir zu. Für sie kann ich nicht sprechen.
As far as my own part is concerned, I'll listen to you. I can't speak for her.
The accusative meinen eigenen Anteil marks the precise scope of your willingness to listen.
Was den Sonntag angeht, freue ich mich auf euch beide. Euren Streit müsst ihr aber ohne mich klären.
As for Sunday, I'm looking forward to seeing both of you. But you'll have to resolve your dispute without me.
A warm statement after the frame reduces its potentially distancing effect.